Hello you

it seems that this blog has been neglected, i apologize.

need an update?
Well ill give you your fill.

Work, School, and Jazz (yes, it is a league of its own) have created a black hole that has taken over my social life. I barely see anyone (unless they're my jazz buddies or people from work,) suckyyyyy! i barely get to see my parents anymore either. Hell, dad called me up earlier this week and left me a voicemail that went along the lines of this....
" Hey kim, just calling because i haven't seen you at all this week. Just wanted to see what you were up to and how school and work are going."
i didnt get to answer because i was in class. It just seems like a strange thing because i live with him.... hmmmm weird.

on a lighter note, we have a lot of traveling coming up after spring break. We get to sing at the Fullerton Jazz festival, Disneyland, and Mt Hood. Kinda stoked :)

um... i think thats pretty much it.
oh, Jazzline gets to sing with Gretta Matassa tonight, over at Tula's out in seattle.... gonna be a really cool gig.
ill let you know how that goes.

um... yeah, thats all.
bye ♥

I keep finding myself mumbling,

"i don't know"

i've been in a weird mood since last night. i dont really know whats going on. im contemplating, and i can't seem to make a clear concise answer to my questions.
i'm sure that these jazz music and lyrics aren't helping at all.


Perhaps i just need a little bit of space....(?) doesn't that always help when someone has a problem? stepping out of the situation and taking a look at everything without any attachment?

it's times like these that i wish i would stop acting like such a fuckin girl.
"but who can you trust now? when you can't even tell between lust and love?!"

Blame it on my Youth

Richard introduced me to this song last week.
I fell in love.
This song pretty much sums up my experiences with love.
So thank you Richard, i know you were uber drunk when you sang this to me, but whatever.

haha, this is a cover, but im in love with this guys voice.
If you get a chance, check out the version by Jamie Cullum.... Fuckin Amazing.
Thank goodness for Jazz nights and looking for old jazz standards ♥

If, I expected love, when first we kissed, blame it on my youth
If only just for you, I did exist, blame it on my youth
I believed in everything
Like a child of three
You meant more than anything
You meant all the world to me

If, you were on my mind, all night and day, blame it on my youth
If, I forgot to eat, and sleep and pray, blame it on my youth
If I cried a little bit, when first I learned the truth
Don’t blame it on my heart, blame it on my youth

Goodbye two thousand hate

Dear 2008,

You were the year for hook ups, shake ups, and break ups. Although it was a fun year, it was a tough one. You forced me to learn a lot about myself. Stuck me in situations that i would not have thought that i'd be in...ever. You put me in the most uncomfortable situations sometimes, but i didn't mind it, i liked the challenge. I liked seeing how i reacted during them.
I would love to say that i've grown from the experiences that happened in "Two Thousand Hate" but only time can tell. I guess what im trying to say is that, you were awesome, but im totally ready for something new. I know that this new year will bring in some better and more challenging experiences for me.
Goodbye 2008.... and as for you 2009, all i can say to you is "FUCKIN BRING IT"



♥ Kimberlie

repeat.

I've just been listening to this song on repeat since this morning.
Thanks for sending it... :)


Per Fare a meno di te
non so dove me ne andrò
che cosa inveterò
Per fare a meno di te
Io no, non mi sveglierò
non ti ricorderò

Quando guardo il cielo
cerco te
distrattamente guardo il
cielo e cerco te
e mi sollevo

Per Fare a meno di te
Non so quanto cuore avrò
io mi difendero

Quando Guardo il cielo
cerco te
Distrattamente guardo il cielo
e cerco te
E mi sollevo

Sulle circostante il tempo scivola ( sopra di noi)
l'infinito sceglie la sua lacrima
Dove cercare ( qualcosa di più) (ancora)
E fare a meno di te

Quando guardo il cielo
cerco te
Distrattamente guardo il cielo
e cerco te
E scioccamente mi sollevo
su con te
su con te
su con te

♥

Hi, im Kimberlie

and i have commitment issues......

When i was the ripe age of 17 i fell in love for the first time, and people around me at the time can vouch about this, i fell HARD. I fell for a boy (notice how i say boy and NOT man) who made my heart skip a beat, who would open doors for me, and who would ultimately break me like a porcelain doll being dropped onto a concrete floor. It was a disaster; i cried myself to sleep for almost 2 years because of that relationship, and although all that shit happened... i missed him. I missed the things that we used to do together, i missed being myself around him without having to worry, and i missed the security of having someone that cared for me.After everything was all said and done, my heart mended again, i decided..... that im so young. I had all the time in the world to find "Mr Right." If there is such a thing.What people need to understand is that, i like to have fun. I like to meet new people, i like the rush of kissing someone for the first time, and also the rush of waking up the next morning and seeing your clothes scattered all over the floor.Think what you want of those statements, but just know that im living my life the way that i want to. Im meeting new people and finding out the different qualities that i like to have in a man that im dating. When im ready to settle down, i will. When someone is amazing enough to sweep me off my feet again, i'll be ready. Call me picky, call me high maintenance, but im not settling for anything less than i want... especially when it comes to men.

wait....

you still dont get it?!
Key Points: I don't like to exclusively date people (as of this point and moment in my life)
I like to have fun, it doesn't mean im a slut, whore, or bad person

Im still looking for qualities in men that i want to have in my life.

Theres a little lesson on my view of relationships and history of love.

Learn how to deal with it please.

Its a little strange...

I awoke with the sound of cars steadily making their way down the street, with the sun just making its way into the room. Awoke in a bed different from my own, a bed that i havent been in in months. Stared blankly at the floor below and saw my dress, thrown carelessly onto it from the night before.

Its a little weird. I thought that i was done with everything... i mean it had been months since the last time that i had to drive down 45th at that time of night. My stomach was in knots as i drove under the bridge and made that sharp right hand turn up to his place. Weird..... is the only word that i can think of right now. So much happened. This was my view on the way home, it was a bitter sweet taste in my mouth.

I just dont know what to think anymore. Sometimes i wonder if my heart knows something that my brain doesn't. Maybe thats why i keep making this choice over and over again? Then again i could just be making the same mistake over and over again... im not really sure what the deal is.
Personal blog will be up on my myspace in a few days.